Achoo!

Ugh, I keep on sneezing, I must be coming down with something. I also must be very thin because my skirt keeps on falling down, same with the bone in my hair for some odd reason, uh... now I'm starting to dream about food and I will do anything to get it! *bangs chest*. Ugh, this must be what the new update is, we get 5 new idles but that seems to be it. Oh, what's that on the bottom left hand corner of the island? Oh, it's a picture of that doodler guy. Hmm, I wonder what that... Oh no, that's a challenge mark, vegenator must have challenged my god to an ooga jump contest. Yay! He chose Klik!....... Yay! He failed misserably which means that Klik is now pile drived into the ground, yay 4 friend challenges! :3

Ugh!

Ugh! Ow! Oh the pain! I'm on the toilet and my God is making me speed poop in order to come out so Klik doesn't explode from waiting. Dang you Klik! DANG YOU! Oww!

*sigh*

Still no new followers, or any at all, hopefully once they mention me at the pocketblog it will bring in some new views. ME NO LIKE TALKING TO SELF! (};~_~{)

PG_Ooga

Yayz! Me twitter buddy, who types right next to me on the island, is talking about me and the blog on his twitter, hopefully that brings in some new views. :3

First piranhas now boats!? What's next!? A zombie invasion! ... i hope not...

I... Hate... Dave... And.. My.. God. I HATE THEM! My God kept me under the water getting eaten by killer fish since the update came out yesterday. So he finally turns it off and wouldn't ya know it! Harbor master was updated now making me swim with heavy cargo as I crazily try to avoid boats!

So you may be wondering, how is that pygmy so good looking, well ladies let me tell ya... however, since this is a blog about me and what's up on the island, I'm afraid I can't tell you about how I keep my devilishly handsome looks.

Even so, in bait master, once you send us down underwater drop the anchor to ring a sound that will attract the piranhas. Once that happens, the (cruel) game begins. Drag a line from the piranha to us to get the piranha to eat and beat us up. But be careful, if two piranhas get too close together, they will cause a fight sending the on screen piranhas swimming away, ending the mini game. Also now in Ooga Jump, the Doodler comes sooner. Oh JOY!

In the Harbor Master thingy, hold the Harbor Master logo for a few seconds on the home screen, and you will see me fall from the sky for my awesome solo dance. Once you see me dancing, as you play the game, you will see us swimming happily about (only because we're getting paid big money for this) holding cubes on our chests, you have to guide us through the waters and into a loading dock where we will drop our cargo and swim away while avoiding giant ships that could crush us on impact.

Oh! And don't tell my God, but I'm going to throw him a surprise birthday party on the 16th and my present to him is going to be a piranha in a box. But don't tell him.

Yay 4 falling nerds

OOOOWWWWW! Klik just fell from the sky into the out house from failing in Ooga Jump. But at least he fixed the toilet and made a spear out of sand and rocks that we used to kill that dino with. Life lesson learned: when in need, go into an out house with a broken toilet and a nerd will fall from the sky to fix the toilet and create a murder weapon out of grounded up pieces of rock.

MAN!

I HATE MY GOD! He turned the spear off so I couldn't kill the dino, right now i'm in the out house hiding. Ugh, and worst of all, Klak was just in here and he broke the toilet, now the toilet is spraying fluids at me. Where's that nerd Klik when you need him?

Hello

Hi, I'm the actual Failboat (the below post was made by my idiot God Failbla using my account), the most famous Pygmy in the world. What? You've never heard of me! Your loss. Even so, I live on an island in the middle of nowhere and I am here to tell you about my life and such. So... ya. (}OoO{) AH! Dino! I'll chat later. AHHHHH!

First postzorz!

Eloz party peoples! lol, but srsly, I b Failboat, but u can call me Fail. Here I talk about things about Pocket God, the best game in the universe. So enjoy my text-talkish-trying-to-be-funny-joking-around-but-still-informational posts.

- :3